This season marks the 30th anniversary of the Brewers only trip to the World Series. Call me old-fashioned, but I think we should celebrate in style, 1982 style.
During the early 80’s men were defined by their facial hair. The Milwuakee Brewers of the day, were a team of powerful, unapologetic, lip sweaters. Rollie Fingers, Pete Vuckovich, Cecil Cooper, Robin Yount, and so on and so on. It was not just a fashion statement, but a way of life. You didn’t wear your mustache, your mustache wore you. That team was rough rugged and did whatever it took to get the job done.
To the left you will note the mustache chart. Please study it and try to envision a team that covers the entire spectrum of the chart. It would be glorious.
A mustache automatically writes a check that you have to be able to cash. If nine mustachioed men take the field in April, teams are going to poop their pants…figuratively…or maybe literally. Hard to say. Either way, the Brewers would become the most intimidating team in all of baseball. Do you think Roy Halladay has the testicular fortitude to walk out to the mound on opening day, as Doc Holliday? Hell no!!
If you have ever read this site, you know how we feel about mustaches. We take them very seriously and believe wholeheartedly in the awesomeness that they can bring an individual. That is why I have decided to take up the torch and try to get the 2012 Brewers to have a throwback season, Brewers style.
I have decided to call this movement “Brewstache 2012″. Now, I can guarantee you that some of the members of our beloved Brew Crew can pull off the stache. John Axford already has proven that mustaches can take you to magical places if you play for this organization. Corey Hart has had that weird blond chin strap facial hair going on for the past few seasons and it seems to be working out ok. The point is, this has been a pretty clean cut team and maybe facial hair is just the thing they need to push them to the next level. Here are a few ideas for our boys:
Yo Gallardo – The Keith Hernandez
Rickie Weeks – The Shaft
Ryan Braun – The Ron Swanson
Zack Greinke – The Derek Holland aka The 6th graade bully
Randy Wolf – The Grizzly Adams
Mat Gamel – The French Taunter
Do yourself a favor and make sure you click on each of these links.
Now this is just the tip of the iceberg. All I am trying to do is build up a little steam and maybe put a little pressure on the guys to embrace their inner bad ass. Even without Prince, this team will be in the running for postseason glory. They need something to push them over the edge, I believe that thing to be…the mustache.
As Brewers fans, it is our responsibility to encourage our team to embrace their bushy lipped heritage. Who’s with me?!?!?! Mustaches for everyone!!!!!