Where are you in the Brewers grieving process?

Let’s start with what was really cool about this weekend. It was Mother’s Day (Love you Mom) and we almost saw two no-hitters on back to back nights. First from Cardinals Jaime Garcia on Friday, then Yo Gallardo followed up with a one hitter on Saturday. There is an easy explanation for why Yo pitched so well… he had no other choice. The Brewers held a 1-0 lead until the Top of the 9th inning in Saturday’s game. If he would have allowed a run, the odds are pretty high that the Crew would have lost that game. Absolutely the worst offensive team in baseball right now. If we take away the little 3 run outburst of “junk runs” they got in that 9th inning on Saturday, this team averaged 1 run per game over the past 9 outings.

At this point I am beyond concerned. The fan in me is almost ready to put this team to rest. I recently purchased a cemetery plot in my soul. The good news is that it will be right next to the 2010 season. This made me wonder, where are the rest of you in your grieving process. Let me break down where I am at.

There are 5 stages of grief:

1) Denial and Isolation

– I already experienced this last week, when I locked myself in the bathroom. As I lay there under the shower, crying, I just repeated to myself over and over again, “World Series Champion Milwaukee Brewers!!!” Eventually I left the bathroom, but refused to leave the apartment…until I had to go to work in the morning. The denial phase came in the form of JAMF’s and articles about my pets. It is easier to deny reality if you chose to ignore it.

2) Anger

– This phase of the grieving process began when Kameron Loe gave up the go-ahead home run against the first batter he faced last Thursday night. In the past, one run would be nothing to be worried about. However, the team’s recent inability to score more than 1 run per game unleashed my inner Hulk. Needless to say, Lou smash…Lou smash everything that not make wife mad.

3) Bargaining

– Well…this one I am not too sure about. I have been considering whom we could trade Fielder to next month. Even so, not sure if I understand this phase.

4) Depression

– This is where I currently find myself. You may have noticed that last week saw less and less baseball chatter. There were mustache articles and growing concerns over the mental anguish Brewers pets are experiencing. Watching this team flounder offensively has caused my grieving to go from phase 1 to phase 4 in just a matter of 10 days. I think that “depressing” is the only word to describe this team at the present. The fact that Roenicke is more confident in Mark Kotsay than he is in Corey Hart, is sooooo depressing. Nyjer Morgan will be out of the lineup until at least the beginning of June and that is another huge problem. Today I saw the team put Craig Counsell in as a pinch-hitter.  Then I saw him have an amazing at-bat to keep the team alive, only for Rickie Weeks to strikeout on 3 straight pitches. Depressing.

5) Acceptance

– I assume that this could be just a few more days away. As of right now the Brewers are 5.5 games back of St. Louis, they are 6 games under .500 and are one game out of last place in the division. If this team continues this current trend, they will be out of the playoff picture with plenty of time to find a new home for Prince. I DO NOT want to be at this stage in the middle of May, but it is not up to me.

I have really tried to stay as positive as possible, but when Colby Rasmus doubled in 2 runs in the 5th inning today I already knew that the game was over. ‘Brewers Super-Fan” Walter just looked at me and sighed. He knew it too. What bothers me most, the starting pitching has been terrific on the whole. We should not be losing games when Marcum only gives up one run, or when Narveson gives up 3 runs. I could not ask for anything more from this pitching staff. Randy Wolf has blown my mind with how well he has been pitching. During spring training he looked like a clone of Jeff Suppan. But now he is giving us every opportunity to win games that he is pitching in. Brewers management has built us a really solid pitching staff, but no baseball team can win games scoring 1 run on offense.

Look everyone, I know that you look to me to sort of lighten the mood in these troubled times, but the truth is I need some help myself. It is getting harder and harder for me to find bright spots in these games. The team is spiraling out of control and all I can do is watch…and cry. The Brewers only win in the last 9 games only happened because Gallardo almost made history with a No-No!! Unless every pitcher can throw no-hitters the rest of the season, things are going to keep getting worse. Our lineup is making guys like Kyle McClellan and Brandon Beachy look like Cy Young and Sandy Koufax.

There is one thing that I have heard being mumbled, in dark conspiracy corners, that is of some interest. The word on the street is that the Brewers might be asking about Jose Reyes of the Mets. Now, as much as I would love to see virtually anyone else at short besides Betancourt, we just do not have enough talent left to make that deal happen. This gives me a little hope though, because it means that management has realized that Betancourt is about as useful as a Jeff Suppan pitching school. Yuni is absolutely terrible at the plate and his glove is nothing that can’t be replaced. Betancourt is the anchor to a horrible bottom of the lineup, batting just a shade under .240 on the season. A shake-up needs to happen…NOW!!!

At least “Satan’s Road Trip” is over and we have the Padres coming to Miller Park for the next few days. It will also give us another look at Big Zack Greinke. He is scheduled to pitch tomorrow against Mat Latos. Last season Latos was the toast of southern Cali, but this season he is flashing an 0-4 record with a 4.55 ERA. Then on Tuesday, Marcum will take the mound with his team best 2.05 ERA. So, on paper we should be able to at least snag 2 out of 3 from the Padres, but paper has let me down in the past.

Ok faithful readers, where are you in the grieving process? I really want to know!! Please post which phase you are currently at in the comments section. I will respond with any sort of counseling that I can muster. Everyone just promise me you will stay off the ledge. This photo was taken late Sunday night, it is really difficult to talk a dog off the ledge. I assume it is easier with a person. Have a nice Monday everybody.