Josh Donaldson: Toronto Blue Jays (1 day, $0)
It would be difficult, if not altogether impossible, to envy Dan Lozano, the agent who will be tasked with finding a new home for Josh Donaldson next year. Donaldson has played for seven teams over 14 seasons, and is not particularly well loved in most of the cities those teams represent. Known more than anything for his arrogance on the field and off, there is very little love for him among players or fans. Accordingly, it feels unlikely that Donaldson — at 37, who already accepted the league minimum pay with the Brewers this year and has taken three trips to the 60-day IL, one as recently as July of this year — will be able to find a team to sign a big league deal with at all.
That's where the Blue Jays come in. Donaldson was an All-Star with them in 2016, AL MVP in 2015, and a Silver Slugger in both years. His greatness peaked in Toronto. So here's the proposal: the Blue Jays sign him to a one-day ceremonial contract so that he can retire as a Blue Jay. No need for Josh Donaldson Day, a la King Felix, no need to add him to Toronto's Level of Excellence, a la Jose Bautista. Just a simple, ceremonial gesture and maybe a short press conference that will finally send Donaldson off quietly.